Wrong is right.

Right now I'm about to give up. Give up everything. Nothing seems to work for me, and I'd actually wish that I was brought to the mashouse instead of beeing here with my evil mom and dad. Specially mom. She's so unfair that I always want to hurt her in some way. When she refuses me the things I whish for the most, when she thinks she protects me, Iæm actually getting really hurt, and I do things I shouldn't to myselv, and I think thoughts, making plans on how to escape. Whats the point of living when you can't do what you love? What's the point of living when you can't be the person you want to be? What IS really the point of doing anything at all? I don't understand human beeings at all. All they live for are others.. but why can't we live alone? Is that the reason why I don't care for my life.. because I'm lonly? Or because I'm beeing apathetic.. That I simpely doesn't care for anyone else then myself.. The world is so unfair. I shouldn't depend on other people..I have to make up for my own living, but it's inmpossible. I need my evil mom and my stupid obsessed by the devil stepdad to live.. I can't live at the street because I don't have any talent at all.. Maybe I could draw and sell, but I doubt people would buy it. IF i left, my mom and my dad wouldn't have accepted it either.. They would come looking for me I think, like a prisoner. But hey, at least I have someone that looks after me.. I guess people wpuld think that way, I'm not sure why I don't. I just think they take away my freedom. it's better to die for something you believe in, than live as a prisoner..

At least I could die as a free woman..
My head is all over the place, I don't know what I'm saying..
I'm perfectly normal they say, there's nothing wrong with me. This is just the way 15 years old are. Even though I'm 16 now.. I don't feel that I have the aouthority to say anything. My parents say that I'm only 16, but I don't even think I will laugh at this when I read it later, because I don't feel like 16, I feel like a 1000 year
s old stone. Grey and it hurts to touch it. It's not soft and round..

I'm afraid of my mom more than anyone else in the world.
Watashi wa kowaii desu.
Afraid to live. To live right, but at my point of wiew wrong is right